Title: Still The End Of the World [Max/Liz]
Fandom: Roswell
Rating/Warnings: R for an explicit fumbly first time.
Summary: Max has a visitor of his own from the future.
A/N: Set a few weeks after 'The End Of The World'. This was my first
serious fanfiction, other than some X-files stuff I had done in high
school, and my first sex scene ever. It's kind of terrible, you'll
notice.
Max stood on Liz’s balcony, torn between the urge to
stare through her window or flee back to the safety of his own room. He
realized that his behavior was becoming obsessive. That morning Isabel
had grilled him angrily about where he was spending all these hours
each night, even though she knew just as well as anybody where Max went.
He just couldn’t figure out what had happened. They
had been desperately in love, couldn’t keep their hands off each other,
and then she tries to convince him that she slept with Kyle? Max’s
heart broke all over again as he thought of finding them like that. He
knew Liz would never do that, and his mind worried at the problem
constantly trying over and over again to find a solution. Why would Liz
try to break them up? It was almost as if she wanted him to fall out of
love with her…
Max felt tears slide down his face as he watched Liz
sleep. She tossed and turned, whimpering in her sleep. Max knew from
watching her night after night that she was hardly sleeping at all and
wracked with nightmares when she did. She would wake up screaming
or crying, sometimes calling his name, and it was all he could do not
to break in her French door and hold her. The only thing that held him
back was the certainty that Liz wouldn’t do this for no reason, if only
he knew what she dreamed about…
“So you were here that night.”
Max whirled around to see Liz step out of the
shadows behind him. He looked back and forth between the sleeping Liz
and the Liz before him several times before he realized that this Liz
was not his Liz. She was older, with short hair, lines marring her face
and a sadness in her eyes so deep that Max couldn't look at them for
more than a second.
“I thought you were on my balcony when I first woke
up,” she whispered, and the despair in her voice made Max’s tears flow
faster down his face. “But then I came out here and you were gone. I
thought it was a dream…”
“Who are you?” Max asked desperately, fighting the
conflicting urge to hold this Liz in her despair and the knowledge that
somehow this was without a doubt not his Liz.
“I’m her,” she said, waving towards Liz’s door. “I’m
Liz 14 years later.”
In Max’s grief-stricken and sleep deprived state, he
accepted this without comment, but realized that this Liz could surely
tell him what this was all about.
“Then tell me why Liz is doing this to me.”
The older Liz’s piercing gaze drilled deep inside of
Max and froze him.
“Because you told her to.” Max stood rooted to the
spot while the future Liz explained. She told him of his future self
coming to her and telling her that her world would be destroyed if she
didn’t make Max stop loving her. She told him how the future Max had
known where he would be and just what to do to push Max’s buttons. How
he had stood in Liz’s bathroom and watched her with Kyle to make sure
they made him see just what he was supposed to see. How Liz had sworn
not to tell him. Max absorbed it all with a growing sense of horror at
what his future self had put Liz through, but also a strange, dark kind
of pride that his Liz had borne this all alone.
“But why are you here?” Max asked.
“Because they were wrong.” This Liz’s voice was dull
and full of pain. “It didn’t save the world. It didn’t make anything
better. It just caused more pain. And now he…you…” her face twisted ad
she choked on her words. Max impulsively stepped forward and took her
head between his hands.
He saw himself,
face every bit as lined as hers, lying in this Liz’s arms.
He was dying.
He saw himself
stare into the eyes of the future Liz and heard himself whisper why?
The future Liz grabbed his hand and forced her memories of her
encounter with the future Max into him as quickly as she could. Oh god,
he heard himself say. His eyes began to cloud and he whispered I’m
sorry.
God, I am so sorry…
The Liz in front of Max was shaking violently, tears
pouring down her cheeks.
“All for nothing,” she whispered. “I can’t stop the
end of the world,” she continued shakily, “but I won’t let her live
through what I have. There’s no reason for all this pain.”
She held Max in place with the darkest eyes Max had
ever seen.
“Go save her, Max. Marry her. Love her as hard as
you can. You don’t have long, but you do have now. And I would give
anything to have back the time I wasted.”
Max was still reeling from his glimpse of the smoky,
dying future. “Isn’t there anything we can do?” he pleaded of the
future Liz.
“I held on for so long,” Max could barely hear the
rustle of this Liz’s voice, “because I thought our future selves must
have known something I didn’t, you were so sure of how and why I had to
hurt you…but when you stopped breathing in my arms, I realized that
they didn’t know anything that I didn’t. Anymore than you do.”
A strangled cry came from Liz’s room.
“She’ll wake up in a few minutes,” future Liz said.
“For god’s sake, get in there and take whatever happiness you can have.”
Max started towards Liz’s door, and then stopped.
“What happens to you if I change all of this?” he asked.
“If there is any mercy in this world, then my
timeline will die out when you change the past, and I will too.” Max
turned to go to Liz. “And Max?”
Max turned for a last look at the grim figure his
Liz could have become through her devotion to him.
“Be gentle. Its her first time,” she said with the
saddest smile imaginable.
Max in a few quick steps went back to this Liz and
crushed her to his chest. “How could you believe anything you could do
would ever make me stop loving you?”
The future Liz pulled away from Max and shook her
head.
“My Max is gone. But she can still be happy with you
at least for a while.” She pushed Max away hard. “Get in there, she’s
waking up.”
Max paused at Liz’s door and took a last look back,
but the other Liz was gone. A loud whimper, brought his attention back
to his Liz.
She was sitting bolt upright in bed, staring at him.
He took a deep breath and pushed open her door. As he approached her
bed, she pressed herself against the headboard, as far away from him as
she could.
“Don’t do this to me,” she whispered.
“It’s really me,” Max said sitting on the edge of
her bed.
“No,” Liz shook her head, tears beginning to spill
down her face. “I can’t bear it.”
“You aren’t dreaming,” Max held out a hand to Liz,
but she wouldn’t move. He reached further and ran a fingertip
down her cheek. He felt an electric shock run between them, but the
knowledge that is was not a dream seemed to make Liz more agitated.
“You have to go,” she pleaded. “You have to go to
Tess.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” Max said calmly.
“Please,” begged Liz. “Don’t do this to me…”
“I know you didn’t sleep with Kyle,” Max continued.
“And I know why you told me you did.” Liz accepted this at face value,
but it didn’t change anything.
“Then you know why you have to go,” she said flatly.
Before she could dodge him he reached out and pulled
her head close to his. He showed her her future self and his future
self’s death. She cried out when the future Max’s eyes fluttered closed
and began to sob. Max pulled her tightly to him, and she didn’t try to
pull away. They both cried, for themselves, for their future selves,
and for the destiny of their planet. Finally, Liz slumped exhaustedly
in Max’s arms. He was washed over in a wave of weakness himself, with
his lack of sleep the last few weeks.
He laid back on Liz’s bed, pulling her with him,
unable to sit upright any longer. They clung to each other like
survivors of a tragedy, which, he supposed, they were in a way.
“What are we going to do?” Liz asked tearfully.
“We’re going to get married,” Max said simply.
“Oh?” Liz asked.
“If we only have 14 years, I’m not wasting another
second of it.”
Liz lifted her head and looked into Max’s eyes. “We
can’t get married right now,” Liz said, voice hoarse from crying. “We
have school tomorrow.”
A smile grew on Max’s face as he hugged Liz tighter. “That sounds like
my Liz,” he said.
“I missed your smile so much,” Liz sighed. Max brushed the hair from
Liz’s face and leaned down to kiss her. Their first kiss was long and
soulful, as if they were trying to make up for all the kisses they had
lost over the last weeks. When Max’s tongue brushed over her lip, Liz
shuddered against him and ran her own tongue over his. Electricity,
warm and sharp, ran through them, making them both gasp.
Suddenly, the T-shirt separating them was too much for Liz. She slid
her hands under Max’s shirt and ran her palms over his muscled stomach.
He closed his eyes and arched against her touch. Liz pushed Max onto
his back and climbed on top of him, pushing his shirt out of her way as
she did so. Max pulled the shirt over his head and tossed it to the
floor. She leaned down and kissed him hard, her hair brushing the sides
of his face.
Max’s hands found their way underneath Liz’s shirt
and he slid them up her sides. He ran them down her smooth back and ran
his fingers teasingly over the small of her back. She squirmed on top
of him, but he held her tightly with one arm and repeated the action
deliberately until she shook in agonized laughter.
“Stop!” she begged. “My parents will hear us!”
Max stopped tickling her, but didn’t let go of her.
He used his now-free hand to pull her head down for another serious
round of kisses, which were rapidly becoming very insistent. Liz pulled
away and sat up on Max, riding high on his hips. She crossed her arms
in front of her and pulled her shirt over her head.
Neither moved as Max stared at her, the love so
palpable in his gaze that Liz nearly started to cry again. Suddenly Max
sat up against her and Liz gasped as her cool flesh touched his warm
chest. Max covered one of her small breasts with a large warm hand. Liz
made a noise deep in her throat as Max grazed her nipple with his palm,
making it tighten. He kissed her again, more gently, but he didn’t stay
on her lips long. He slowly ran kisses down her neck and leaned her
backwards slowly so he could reach between her breasts. She tangled her
hands in his dark hair and leaned her head over his, breathing in his
scent. She leaned into him, urging him on.
When he finally did take one of her nipples into his
mouth, she stifled a moan that would have surely brought her parents
running into the room. He flicked his tongue over her, and heat shot
through the lower half of her body.
Two can play at that game, she thought, flitting her
fingernails over one of Max’s nipples. The rumble in Max throat made
Liz’s chest vibrate. She dropped her hands to the button of Max’s
jeans, but Max stopped kissing her and covered her hands with his.
“Are you sure?” he asked. “Are you scared?”
Liz smiled at the familiar words, but didn’t
hesitate. “Yes,” she said, the answer to both questions being the same.
Max took a firm hold of Liz and rolled her under him
in a swift motion. He hooked his thumbs in the waistband of her boxers
and slid them over her hips. When he couldn’t stretch his arms any
further down, Liz took over and kicked them off. Max stopped everything
and simply stared at her, hovering above her, supporting his weight on
his wrists. He sank to one elbow and ran his other hand down the length
of Liz’s body.
“You are so beautiful,” he breathed, taking Liz’s
breath away with the weight of his stare. “How could I ever give you
up?” He seemed to be asking himself more than anything, and Liz only
kissed him in reply, because she didn’t know his answer.
She reached between them and unhooked the button of
his jeans, then slid the zipper down agonizingly slowly. Max covered
her hands with his own as he helped her slide the resisting denim off
his body and to the floor. Max hesitated, the uncertainty obvious on
his face.
“I don’t really know what I’m doing,” he confessed.
“Neither do I,” Liz said reassuringly as she ran her
hand firmly up his erection. Max laughed softly at the obvious
disconnection between her words and her actions. He gathered her in his
arms under him, sliding his hands between her and the bed and resting
his weight fully on her.
“I’m afraid I’ll hurt you,” he said, still
reluctant. Liz reached up and tangled her hands in his hair.
“You will,” she told him, staring back into his dark
eyes. “But its worth it. Any pain is worth it for you, Max.”
Liz’s words might have been fluff at any point
before this, but Max knew it was true because Liz had already borne the
worst pain imaginable, and he had asked her to do it for him.
“I am so sorry, Liz,” he unconsciously repeated the
words of his older, dying self. “God, I am so sorry.”
“Don’t tell me,” Liz shook her head a little. “Show
me.”
Max raised himself above her, never breaking their
gaze. Still staring up at him, Liz reached down and guided him into
her. She bit her lip hard, but didn’t close her eyes as he eased into
her. Max lowered his head and kissed her softly, trying to stay still
until she got used to him being inside her. He was having a hard time
keeping himself under control since all he wanted to do was bury
himself inside her tight wetness.
Excruciatingly slowly, he began to move inside her.
Her eyes widened at first, but then Liz began to mover her hips in time
against his. As their rhythm sped up, Max drew perilously close to the
edge of his orgasm, but refused to let go before he pushed Liz over the
edge. He bit his lip so hard it bled, absolutely intent on Liz writhing
below him, obviously very near to her own climax.
She would have beat him to it as he had planned, if
she hadn’t chosen that moment to dig her nails into his butt and drive
him deeper into her than he ever would have dared. He crushed his mouth
to hers and moaned her name into her mouth as spasms ripped through him
and left him shuddering and spent. He was vaguely aware of Liz’s last
contractions rhythmically pulsing around him inside of her, and
realized with relief that she had cum only moments after him.
For what seemed like a lifetime they lay tangled
together like that, Max still inside of Liz, but it didn’t seem like
nearly long enough when she began to stir under him. He began to slide
out of her, but she hung on to him.
“Don’t move yet,” she whispered, opening her eyes
and peering up at him from under heavy lashes.
“I’m too heavy to lay on you this long,” he
protested, still trying to move. Liz’s grip held firm.
“Just a little while longer,” she murmured, closing
her eyes again. Max solved the problem by taking a firm grip on her,
and rolling them both over again so that he was on the bottom this
time. He slipped out of her in the course of this maneuver, but she
only sighed in protest. She draped herself limply over Max and lay
quietly, rising and falling with his breath. Max tilted his head up to
kiss the top of Liz’s head…
…and for a moment in the reflection of her window,
he could have sworn he saw the figure of the older Liz, wearing the
same sad smile…
…and then it was gone. He tightened his grip on his
own Liz, sleeping peacefully in his arms.
*
* *
*
* *
At dawn Max crept silently out of Liz’s room and
shut the French doors softly behind him. He bent despite some
interesting aches to tie his sneaker, when something caught his eye. He
reached over and picked it up, then straightened, holding the object.
It was a dried white rosebud. The morning breeze
ruffled his hair and blew past his cheek like a caress, and he could
have sworn he heard someone whispering…
...As I threw the
flowers up to you I remembered that you preferred white roses…
With an impulse that he couldn’t explain, Max
returned through Liz’s door and curled one of her hands around the
dried flower. He bent and kissed her forehead, then left the room for
the final time, wiping away tears without knowing why or for whom he
was shedding them.
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