Title: 20 Random Facts About Murata Ken, Great Sage
Fandom: Kyou Kara Maou
Rating/Warnings: PG for millennia-old affections
Summary: Title says it all.
A/N:
Some of you who are in Prince of Tennis fandom have no doubt noticed
the 20 random facts meme that's going around, where the goal is to list
20 facts about a characters/pairing/whatever.
I thought nobody deserved 20 random facts more than Murata did, so I
thought I'd infect this fandom too.
1.
He loved the man to death, but Murata refused to ruin his figure by
bearing the Original Maou an heir (or, let's be honest, heirs; he never
did know when enough was enough). The whole transference of souls in a
bottle thing was really just the Great Sage's Plan B.
2.
Sometimes Murata and Yozak exchange glances over Yuuri and Conrad's
shoulders, respectively, when they are being particularly noble and
insufferable. Yozak's eyeroll says "Good thing they're so cute and we
love them, ne?" and Murata's eyebrow raise replies "These idiots
wouldn't last five minutes without us."
Other times Murata's
eyebrow says, "Let's make a break for the fountain, I can get us to the
other world in two minutes flat," but the farthest away they've ever
got was four and half steps before Yuuri accidentally began a cold war
with a neighboring country, and Conrad made some noises about ritual
suicide.
3. Murata likes to tease Yuuri about having a crush
on his mother, but the truth is that Shibuya-san is much easier to talk
to than his family because she knows about the other world, and because
she is so much more demonstratively affectionate than his own mother.
Now that he spends so much time with Yuuri in Shin Makoku, he actually
misses sitting in the Shibuya kitchen and delivering the Yuuri Special
Edition Spy Report. And he misses Shibuya-san's cookies too.
4.
And wearing the apron. And the way Shibuya-san always squeals about how
tiny Murata's waist is when he ties it on (see also #1, which was completely
justified).
5.
The more the Original Maou manifests himself through Yuuri, the more
his presence fails to fade completely even when Yuuri is 'back'. The
shards of Shinou that Murata sees in Yuuri from time to time leave him
reminding himself fiercely that he has no business forcing his
millennia-old affections on the 27th Maou.
When Yuuri's hair
starts getting a little too long for Murata's composure, he makes a few
choice and innocuous comments to Shibuya-san which result in her
demanding that Yuuri get a haircut.
6. It would probably be
hard to find somebody in Shin Makoku who was less of a handyman than
Murata. The shrine maidens don't seem to mind that they usually end up
showing him how to do everything; Murata has the sinking suspicion that
they just want him to bend over as much as possible.
7. Murata
feels really embarrassed about the way this whole Four Boxes thing has
gotten completely out of hand. He could argue that he was only acting
under orders, but somehow he feels that saying "the Original Maou made
me do it" is a bit of a pale excuse.
8. The first time Murata
saw Yuuri sign a document "Shibuya Yuuri, Harajuku Furi", he suppressed
the snickers. But then he caught sight of the official royal seal that
Gunter had created from it, and laughed until he cried. Sometimes it's
hard being the only person who gets the joke when Earth and Shin Makoku
cross, but moments like these help make up for it.
9. It helps
just as much now that Yuuri is on the same page. During the state
dinner with the dignitary who looked exactly like Sephiroth from Final
Fantasy VII, the only thing that made it bearable was looking across
the table at Yuuri's expression of badly suppressed horror and knowing
that he saw the same thing.
10. Murata feels for Conrad, he likes and respects the man a great
deal, but goddamn,
how many generations will it take for these Wellers stop being such
freaking martyrs? He's thankful to have Yozak deflect some of the
Weller angst with sex and cross-dressing this time around.
11.
Murata has been propositioned by Celi. Sometimes when he sees Wolfram
pressing his advantage with Yuuri and actually making some progress, it
makes Murata feel a little better to imagine telling Wolfram that he
nearly made it with his mother. In the library. In Wolfram's favorite
chair.
12. Toying with adults is getting harder and harder as
Murata grows up and loses some of his childhood cuteness. He's been
cultivating his cheerful idiocy act in replacement, which is just as if
not more effective, but it was a lot easier just looking cute and
innocent. Yuuri has all the luck.
13. The person sneaking all
those explicit yaoi doujinshi into Yuuri's bag isn't his mother. Murata
knows it's cruel, but the most glorious thing in the world is watching
Yuuri shriek "But these aren't MINE!" when Wolfram demands to know why
Yuuri keeps claiming that isn't how things work in his world.
14.
Gwendal doesn't seem to take Murata military and diplomacy suggestions
very seriously, which is going to become a larger and larger problem
for Shin Makoku when times get harder. In fact, he's pretty sure that
Gwendal actively dislikes him, but Yozak assures him Gwendal's like
that with everybody.
Gwendal thaws a little when Murata starts picking up some of the slack
in paperwork. Besides, Yuuri's handwriting is atrocious.
15.
Not that he's one to talk, but Murata privately suspects that Gunter
has a teensy bit of a personality disorder. Or maybe all that hair is
yanking on his brain too hard or something. And, although it's cute in
the most disturbing way imaginable, Murata hates when Gunter drops by
Gwendal's office to lean over his shoulder and make encouraging noises
about his work, because then Gwendal is extra-prickly for hours
afterwards, and will loudly announce at the drop of a hat that he isn't
blushing, its just hot in here, open a damn window, will you?
16.
Deep down, Murata hates Shinou for leaving him behind and forcing him
to remember everything, over and over, maybe forever. He hates him even
more for refusing to rest in peace so that Murata can do the same. He
hates him even more for manifesting in Wolfram's fine features and
Yuuri's clenched jaw, when Murata knows he can never let himself want
either one.
If Murata ever gets to the afterlife, there's going to be a lot of
bondage in store for a certain Original Maou.
17.
Murata loves the Japanese, because they make the best and most bizarre
candy of any people of any place and any time, and believe me, Murata
knows. He's brought a few of his favorites back to Shin Makoku to have
Anissina and the maids try to reverse engineer them, but the results
never quite compare. The first stop for Murata, after a return to
earth, is always the nearest convenience store, while a dripping Yuuri
shakes his head in bemusement. Murata insists that he is not an
addict, it's just that traveling between worlds uses up a lot of
calories.
18.
Murata isn't a huge fan of the glasses that this reincarnation depends
on. They always get broken or scratched, and he can't read the clock in
the middle of the night, and they leave red pinchy marks on the bridge
of his nose. But he does enjoy the way people edge away from him when
he lets the light glint off the lenses in just the right way.
19.
Having a best friend is something that Murata hasn't enjoyed in quite a
few reincarnations, and he isn't sure he can ever tell Yuuri how
thankful he is for it. He'd almost forgotten about small joys like
going to a terrible movie on a rainy Saturday afternoon, and when the
grouchy village matchmaker onscreen looks just like Gwendal, they howl
with laughter until Yuuri's head presses into Murata's shoulder, and
Murata thinks he's had a pretty good run after all.
20. Murata
just doesn't understand why T-Zou hates him. Yozak's suggestion that
his head looked like a dumpling did not make him feel any better.
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